Child Sexual Abuse in KSA

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one of my friend has noticed a sudden change in his little brother behavior for the past 2 months. He refuses to sleep alone in his bedroom. He cries with no reason and he feels insecure all the time. His father and mother weren’t able to understand his situation and the boy refuses to speak about the problem. My friend insist that his brother is fearing of telling something so he went to boy’s friends in elementary school.  Eventually, after along interrogation, one boy told him that he always sees his brother alone with sport teacher in his office.  My brother and his parents were shocked to know later that their child has been sexually abused by his sport teacher for 2 months.

But why the boy has never told his parent from the first time that his teacher was abusing him? How does this incident will have a negative impact on the child even after 10 years?  What should have been done by parent to prevent that from happening in the first place? These questions along with others are the ones that I want to address in my blog this week.

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16 thoughts on “Child Sexual Abuse in KSA

  1. the boy trusts his teacher, and even feeling that what is happening is wrong, he’s scared of displeasing his teacher..
    Parents shud talk to their kids from a young age, telling them that private parts are that PRIVATE! no one shud touch them or even see them..
    Another thing, boys shud never be left for a long time after school, coz that also helps with abuse..

  2. As a teacher, I am shocked and ashamed that such individuals are in the profession. The boy should transfer to another school and the teachers there must be informed so that they will help with the child’s recovery.

    Teachers to-be should undergo pyschiatric tests to see if they’re potential troublemakers.

  3. simran

    i strongly suggest that you report to the police in your area regarding your suspicions (that boy who told your friend about the sports teacher may be needed as a witness) and get psychological counselling for that poor boy as he is badly traumatized. As a psychologist based in the gulf for over a decade, i have firsthand seen the trauma caused by child sex abuse and if no psychological help is provided, this poor child may suffer psychologically and emotionally in his adult years. Remember, the victim is young, his trust has been badly betrayed, is scared from the alleged perpetrator as well as not knowing how to ask his parents for help since he is innocent.

  4. Noor

    .First of all I agree with Simran. The police should be involved. Because that person should be brought to jail. This should Never occur in a school. School is a place where children put their trust in their teacher. The teacher becomes some what of a parent. They are someone you feel safe with. And when something like this occurs it breaks that trust and the child tends to feel the blame falls upon them. The school has a responsiblity to find out everything about their teachers. I don’t know how it is in America, but where I come from teachers have to show if we have a criminal record before we are hired. They are the ones that should know what occuring in their grounds is.

    I cannot imagine what the family is going through right now. I hope they will find a way to help eachother to come through this. They should not blame them selfs, but the predator. You cannot know about what action a person you put your trust (like a teacher) can take. The only thing that can be done is to make your child feel safe to tell you everything about when adults take a step like that. To make children understand that it is not their fault. But I think it is very difficult when child abuse happens with someone you trust very much. A broken trust takes time to repear. But I believe that with understanding and compassion from family members will build that trust again.

    The parents and the schools should work along side eachother to make a safer inviorment for children. To teach them from an early age that if you ever feel something is not right is to always tell somebody.

    I hope your friend’s family will get through this.

  5. Duha,
    your explanation of the problem is thoughtful and truth. children were not taught that there are private part of their bodies. I will talk in depth in regard the issue.

    coralbead,
    I have been in School from elementary to the high school. It was never a safe place. I have never felt secure. I heard it is the same with US school with some differences

  6. simran,
    My friend has talked with the police and the teacher was arrested and banned from teaching but the damage for child will never be solved.
    psychological counseling should play a big role in dealing with issue like this but unfortunately saudi don’t value psychological counseling because they think that it has never solved a problem.

    I really like your psychological analysis of the problem. I will contact you in your email to help more understand some complex issue like this one

  7. Noor,
    child sexual abuse has been ignored by media for along time so there hasn’t been any action taken place.
    My friend and his family have been in very difficult time but now, they are working together to move on. the child is doing very good and feeling better but i am very sure that the damage can’t go away easily. it will take time.

    Anyway, I am really glad to have you in my blog. your comments are always valuable. so thank you

  8. Noor

    Hello,

    I am very glad to hear that your friends brother is doing better under the circumstances. I agree with you about the media. It should be on top of the list.

    But thank you for your comments. I am a new reader to your blog. I think you have a very insightful blog and it is intresting to follow your thoughts.

    / Noor

  9. simran

    >>My friend has talked with the police and the teacher was arrested and banned from teaching but the damage for child will never be solved.
    psychological counseling should play a big role in dealing with issue like this but unfortunately saudi don’t value psychological counseling because they think that it has never solved a problem. <>I don’t know how it is in America, but where I come from teachers have to show if we have a criminal record before we are hired. They are the ones that should know what occuring in their grounds is.<<

    Believe me Noor, i have been working here in North America as counseller for the past few years and i know teachers hired from kindergarten level go through an extensive background check including a complete criminal check, have to be fingerprinted and stuff. And if this incident happened here, it would make it to the media which people here would know about it in the evening news, although most cases here have been female teachers having sex with their underaged students which is still considered sexual abuse. In fact, there is a local station in my area, which shows the faces of child sex abusers/molesters living in the area (it runs 24/7), this is how serious this crime is taken in this part of the world.

  10. Simran,
    Media in US makes money out of publicizing sexual abuse incidents. So, in my opinion, it has made the problem worse.
    what I want the media to do is first to say that there are many children who are exposed to sexual abuse and that people and organization have to take action. second, Media should educate parents in how to deal and communicate with their children. I have a lot to say in this subject. I will talk more about it in my next posts.

  11. Shoaib Al Hashmi

    This is disturbing. I think there are two main reasons why they boy didn’t discuss it with his family:

    1.) He trusted the teacher and never ever thought anything like this would ever happen (after all he is just a kid).

    2.) There might be a communication gap between they boy and his family.

    How can parents avoid these things?
    Parents should close the communication gap with their children. They should help them build a strong personality and encourage them to be self-confident. Also parents should be aware of whatever is going on in their child’s life (this becomes easy if their is no communication gap).

    I guess this would help in denying such pathetic incidents.

  12. Hala

    This story really break my heart, and it happens and continue to happen all the time in our schools, I get really annoyed when I hear my two nephews exchanging the most disturbing words that they hear at school and see posted on the kids toilets, they’re 7 and 9 years old and being raised by my father since my sister is divorced, I hold the phone and call their teachers and I sense that they don’t want to comunicate out of boredom, and I can’t just keep on asking my old father to pop at school to do the teachers jobs of surveillance and monitoring attitudes… I feel afraid and worry about those little kids all the time and I know that they are at risk for such offenses, although they are in a private school, the cases in KSA are under reported because the insults are not always severe, but subtle and hidden, offenders usually get away with it and the children would be left to their own misery to inflect on younger others when they can, really sad…

  13. Shoaib Al Hashmi,
    exactly as you said, when the child lost his/her trust on the poeple around him, he would have a very difficult time.

    Hala,
    I have had the same problem. my family were shocked when my nephews were exchanging very bad words. My father go to the school every time but nothing change. Teacher themselves were using very disturbing words with students. very disappointing

  14. Sara

    Omg, Thats Just Heart Breaking =(..

    I’m 100% Sure That The Teacher Threatened Him, Or Told Him To Keep It a Secret, And If He Told Anyone Something “BAD” Will Happen.

    Because Children Are Gullible, And They Fear Adults, For Obvious Reasons, Especially That Those Words Came From an Adult Is Even More Believable To The Child, So This Registers In His Mind, That What The Teacher Is Doing Is Something Normal, BUT, No One Has To Know.

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