Observation From Inside

Observation From Inside

If there is a list of societies that can be the best target for psychological’s  and sociological research and observation, Saudi society should be in the top five of the them. You have gender segregation and you can easily do a psychological observation about how women  are perceived by men and how men are perceived by women in segregated society like Saudi and then compare that to mixed society like USA.

You can also study the sexual behavior of the people, how do they express their sexual desire and how is it interpreted by the society ! Does the sexual behavior of the human being get strong in the open society more than the closed one? You also have religion, Saudi is known to be very religious country! you can study how religion impact people’s life and how can people play around it!

If you have an interest in any of these topics, then you are most welcome to join me in a journey called “Observation From Inside.” In this journey we (you and I) will do the following:

  • We make an observation!

An observation is very important concept. To understand the logic and the reason behind every human behavior, you have to observe it first and pay attention to every single detail about it.

  • Gather data and information:

You can’t just make a judgment based on one single observation. That is what most people do and it is really wrong. You have to gather data about it and compare it to other studies and observations.

  • Approve and Disapprove that observation:

Because we are naturally bias, we can’t just make a judgment only based on our observation and our information. We have to think of both sides. We have to find what approve and disapprove our observation.

How do you participate in this journey:

You can send me an email via Contact Me to tell me about your observation on specific behavior. You and I open the discussion in here in my blog. Everyone share his analysis then everyone make his/her own judgment based on his reason and logic.

culture, Gender, personal

The Story of Buraidah Girl

I have been asked by one of my friends to comment on the marriage of 12 years old girl to 80 years old man in  Buraidah of Saudi Arabia.

The truth is that I can’t write about this story. I really can’t. The reason is that that the process of writing to me is the process of imagining. It is the process of feeling each word I write. and when I imagine this story, when I imagine this little girl standing alone in one room with this monster, I feel paranoid, angry and tortured.  Then, I feel a sense of insecurity, embarrassment, shame and self destruction.

Make a difference, personal

Kathryn Monet

Kathryn Monet! you may not have heard of this name before, but many Saudi students in Oregon have. She used to work for Saudi Cultural Mission as an academic advisor on Saudi students.  We  have never seen someone dedicated to her/his work as much as Kathryn does.

From the first five minutes you talk with her, you will quickly realize how caring she is. I told her in my first conversation with her that I felt as if she is a darling sister to me.  Kathryn to me is more than just an advisor. She is very inspirational person. She gave me an example of how sincerity in your work impacts the life of others and how the little smile and kindness have the power of transforming people lives.

In fact, the day she decided to leave her position in SACM, was very sad day for all Saudi students in Oregon. In my five years experience with Saudi Culture Mission, there has never been someone like kathryn.

Sometimes, saying “thank you” to a person that has been so kind to you isn’t simple because these two words aren’t always capable of carrying our gratitude and appreciation. There has to be something more especial and valuable and I find it important for me personally to acknowledge this person and to talk about how she made a difference in my life.

I have so many wishes in my life and one of them is eternal happiness for Kathryn. I really wish and pray that her life is filled with happiness, health and joys.

personal

Why!

You know how shameful it is to be a Saudi when the employee in SACM* treat you like dog, like someone who has no dignity and then you have nothing left in yourself but a frustration and a question that you would ask your mom: “Mom, why did you give me a birth in this country, why!”

*SACM = Saudi Cultural Mission in USA

culture, Politics, reflection

Saudi Dreams

“I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream.

I have a dream that one day this country will rise up and live out the true meaning of Islam: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created equal.”

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day women will be able to travel everywhere without the need for a permission or a Mahram.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day a son from a Sunni family and  a son from a Shia family will sit together  in the table of brotherhood, not to argue over who is right or wrong but to think about the future of this country.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, a saudi employer will treat his Indian or Asian employee with respect and love.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, the Imam in each mosque of this country, will talk about love and respect for all other religions.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, the rich people in this country, will realize the sorrow and the suffering of the poor people who live in broken houses without food.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, the religious policy will realize that the moral values can’t be obtained with force but rather with love and tolerance.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, no one can be above the law and no Wasta will provide privilege for someone over others.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, our government will stand up and prosecute those who permit and allow the child marriage in this country.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day everyone has the freedom to speak his mind, to live his life the way he want, to be what he want to be without the fear of  society and traditions.

“This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to my city with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.”

And if Saudi is to be a great nation this must become true.So let love ring from the mountains of Mecca to the farms of Alhassa. Let love ring from the land Ar’ar to the desert of Rub Al-khali. Let love ring from building of Riyadh.

And when this happens, when we allow love, freedom and tolerance to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every town and every city, we will be able to live the true teaching of the prophet Mohammed. Then we will all repeatedly remember the saying of the prophet, that “the believers, in their love, mercy and kindness to one another are like a body: if any part of it is ill, the whole body shares its sleeplessness and fever”

Thank you and god bless you.

God bless Saudi Arabia.

Note:

The main speech is from I have a dream speech by Martin Luther King.. I made some changes on it so that It becomes about Saudi Dreams.

Politics

Discrimination Against 14 Countries

This week, U.S. announced an intense air screening on the fliers from 14 nations. I am not upset about the law itself at all, I really think that America has every right to protect its country but what I am upset about is the idea of treating people from some countries differently than others. It is simply an act of discrimination whether you like it or not!

Time has shown us that human rights are just a theoretical argument and politicians always use it to manipulate the public! and people  are so pathetic and confused. They have no other way but to believe what they hear in TV and see in the movies.

blogging

Saudi Alchemist in 2010

2010 is going to be a different and a crucial year of my life because of many things (finishing up with my university, going back home to visit my family after five years of being away, maybe finding a job, and so many other things)

As for my blog, there will be also few changes in the way I am blogging  and they are:

  • Presenting two sides of the story:

I will try to represent two sides of any story I discuss in my blog. This way, I can be less bias and the readers will get to hear from both sides.

  • Being more positive:

I realize that many of my views are pessimistic so I will try to have some positivity in my writing.

  • Interviews:

I will interview people from different background and experience and share their stories in my blog.

  • Offering Analysis and Solution to the problem:

So instead of just blaming this and that for any problem, I will try my best to provide an analytical view and possible solutions.

Finally, as another way to improve my blog, I would like to hear from you and see your feedback. What are the things you didn’t like in my blog and what are the things that you think I need to improve? What are the topics that you wish I have talked about? and do you think my blog was helpful to you?. Harsh criticism are highly preferred 🙂 so please criticize me please

you can write a comment below and do this quick survey about my blog. It is very short.

culture, discussion, Gender, psychology

Another Victim of Sexual Harassment

The following post is from masstz_blog. She works as a lab specialist in one of the hospitals in Saudi Arabia. The post was written in Arabic and I translated it to English so I can share it with my readers here. The translation isn’t literal so I asked for her permission first in order to translate the general idea of her post. She kindly accepted.

“It was shocking and painful to know that yesterday one of my friends was harassed by one of her coworkers. The harassment was shocking and painful to an extent that I can’t even describe. It was honestly painful for me to hear every detail of the story. It first started with silence then with fear and shock.

It hurt me that she didn’t speak out and talk about it to anyone. She fears that talking about it would make it worse and that people would gossip about it and that would hurt her more. She fears that people would have no mercy upon her story and would blame her first for the incident.

As for people, they always have different reactions and point of views in regard such an incident. There will be those who would start blaming a woman’s decency while others would blame the mixing of genders in the workplace. In both situations, the women will be blamed for what happened to her without hearing every detail of her story. It is sad to realize that there are still sick people with stupid mentalities regardless of the educational advancement and the modern life that we have.

Her story, in every aspect of it, is painful and heartbreaking. I cried with her when she started crying. I felt her fears deeply that nobody can imagine. I personally lost my trust in people around me and for a moment, I became scared of everyone.

I wish I had another heart, one for all of that and for all other things. A heart that can carry all the pain and another one just for living

  • My Comment:

It is indeed a sad story and to really understand what the woman has gone through, you need to imagine yourself in her situation. What if someone harassed you in your workplace and you can’t talk about it or even if you talk about it, you will have all this fear of being blamed and misunderstood?

Sexual harassment happens in Saudi Arabia just like it happens in The US, so I would not go to blame wholly one specific country or society. In fact, I realized that blaming that and this won’t help solve the problem. I mean, I can write 10 posts about the things I hate about the Saudi society and yet nothing will change. So, in this post, I want to present an analysis and solutions and yes, I am going to write it about it in Arabic so my message reaches as many Saudi as it possibly can.

There are many questions that we need to answer in order to offer a solution for the problem. First, what led that man to harass the woman? Is it because of his sex drive and lust or because of something else? Secondly, why would the society blame the woman first? Does segregation help prevent the problem as many religious people claim? These questions along with many others that I want to address here in my blog. Please share your thoughts, questions and answers!

Thanks to Asmaa for correcting my grammatical mistakes 🙂

personal

He Can’t Walk, but He Can Inspire!

He can’t walk. He can’t talk. He can’t move his hands easily. But, he can smile! he can dream and above all, he can inspire! He is unlike many people I have met in my life who always complains for even the tiny things in their lives, he is always optimistic. I see him everyday with his electric chair, moving from one building to another to sell his coffee. But selling coffee isn’t his only job. His another job is to inspire people around him. He would look at you with this innocent smile that tells you: “Hey, YOU CAN ALWAYS DO IT, regardless of the difficulties and frustration you face in your life, you can always do it”

I love this guy so much.I don’t know his name and he doesn’t know my name but  I know that he impacted my life more than the book I have read and the people I have met.

culture, Politics

Is Jeddah Really Different?

“Jeddah is different” is commonly used phrase among Saudi, referring to how different Jeddah is from the rest of the cities. The mater of fact is that Jeddah is unique and different when it comes to its people, culture and its general atmosphere. People from Jeddah are very tolerance and open-minded. Most Sunni & Shia are living together in harmony in Jeddah, unlike other cities of Saudi Arabia where the Sunni-Shia thing is very heated topic. Jeddah’s people are funny, they have this unique sense of humor that attract you to them from the first time.   There is a great mixture and diversity of races and thoughts in Jeddah which enrich the social structure of the city.  In addition to all that, The Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice have the least power in Jeddah in comparison to Riyadh and other main cities.  That has given Jeddah more freedom in most of its aspects of life (like mixing between men and women rather than gender separation)

However, there are many things that Jeddah is indifferent than the rest of cities in Saudi. The poor city infrastructure system, the bad hierarchy system in government agencies, the poverty and the high unemployment rate are almost in every side of this country. For example, The government spends millions and millions of riyals into the infrastructure of Jeddah and just this month, the city turned upside down because a heavy downpour. It is shocking to see how the infrastructure of such main and important city of the rich kingdom is poorly built and managed. People are wondering where the millions of riyals that we hear about it year after year in the newspaper and TV goes? The visionary king request an urgent investigation for what has happened in Jeddah and Saudi people want every official has a hand in this disaster, to be held accountable. Let’s hope that this event will send a message to all officials in this country that they will always be held responsible and accountable for any mistake or manipulation they make.

My heart goes with the families who have lost their loved one in this disaster.